Favorite Quotes
Church: Rookie, did you just call my girlfriend a cow? Tucker: Naw, I think he just called her a slut. Caboose: What's a freelancer? Tucker: Freelancers are independent. They're not red or blue. They're just guns for hire who fight for whoever has the most money. Caboose: Like a mercenary? Tucker: Right! Or like your mom, when the rent's due. Caboose: (pauses) Oh, that's funny. Simmons: No, it's not a spider. It's like a blue thing... Donut: Hey bitch! Remember me?! I saved something for ya! Tucker: Man, that girl's got a good arm. Tex: Oh crap... Donut: HELL YEAH! THREE POINTS YOU DIRTY WHORE! Doc: You know, I really think we should try a non-violent approach to resolve this. O'Malley: I agree, except replace the word "non" with "extremely", and after the word "violent", include the phrase "blood explosion extraordinaire"! Caboose: I call it nap time. Which is right before food time. And then comes food-nap time! That is my favorite time of them all! Sarge: What do you see? Caboose: I see... a room. Sarge: And? What's in the room? Caboose: There are some walls, and some ceilings--no, wait! Just one ceiling. Sarge: What's making all that racket? The blue Soldiers: Kill the reds! Kill the reds! Kill the reds! Kill the reds! Kill the reds! Caboose: You are not going to like it. Sarge: O Blue Team, look what i have Caboose: O Blue Team, look what... wait...let me start over Church: Oh no! I'm the teamkilling fucktard! Simmons: Shotgun! Grif: Shotgun!....Fuck. Donut: Shotgun's Lap! Simmons: FUCK!! Donut: Who wants to hold my legs while i stretch out my hammies! Caboose: Church, if I die, I want you to have my orange juice Voice Mail: To mark this message as urgent, press eleven. Church: THERE IS NO ELEVEN, YOU FUCKING WHORE!! Doc: Oohhhh... language. Church(to Tucker): What's your first name? Tucker: Lavernius. Church: Lavernius? Well then, who is this Andy g… wait a second… Are you black? Tucker: Me? Church: Yeah. Tucker: Does it matter? Church: No, just curious. Tucker: Well, if it doesn't matter, why are you curious? Church: I dunno; I guess it's just something I should have picked up on after all this time. Tucker: You know what else you should have picked up on? My fucking first name! Tucker as Tex: Hi everybody, I'm super horny from all the robot killing. Hey is it hot in here? Who wants to help me out of this heavy armor. This breastplate is so itchy. Tucker: Bow chicka bow- [Tex points her gun at Tucker's head and cocks it back] Tucker: -whoa, story's over! Tex: You're a pig. Tucker: I didn't even get to the part where the sailors show up. |
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