Catharsis
I’m not sure if any of you remember, but a long time ago I was working on a feature film. It was called Deadline. I never really talk about it. A brief history lesson. November 17th, 2006. Here’s the first time I posted about my first feature film. It was me begging Fools to write the script. February 4th, 2007. Here’s a journal that marks the first time Tim and I talked on phone. We’ve talked on the phone for five years now. This marks the start of one of my most interesting and close friendships over the years. Due to Deadline (At this point called Endless Two Weeks. Jeez...) we started talking and became fast friends. In a odd twist of fate, that anniversary just passed by. Tim and I are sharing our wood anniversary. His words, not mine. February 10th, 2007. Here’s the first mention of the name Deadline. I was still 18 years old. May 30th, 2007. Here’s me talking about brand new equipment. The stumbling blocks I mention were a old “friend” leaving the film because he was busy and then threatening to sue me if I still made the film without him. He’s no longer involved. This was very important, as it was the first time I decided I could do it myself, I would push on and not give up. As for the equipment, I won’t be using that camera to film anything. I shot my first short film on it and that’s about it, sadly. The streadi-can rig I never used. June 1st, 2007. Oh god, linking to the site. The site is down, but the crappy forums are still up. I was very eager, and naive back then. July 14th, 2007. He’s when I quietly and discreetly announced it wasn’t happening in 2007, and I was planning on making it in 2008. I never mentioned it again. Deadline changed me a lot. I made a promise to myself to never publicly talk about something till it was 100% guaranteed to happen. Pouring my young, stupid self into Deadline back then so utterly, and talking about it to anyone who would listen... then of course it failed. I was still a teenager. Trying to make a feature film without ever having made a short, without knowing what the hell I was doing. It had to fail. But having it fail, knowing I failed, and then having months of people asking me what happened to it... hardened me. So much so that to this very day I don’t talk about much that’s going on with me until after it happens. Why bring this all up now? Well. Just because I stop publicly talking about something, doesn’t mean I give up. For the past 5 years I have worked on short films, worked on other films, work on getting to know other film makers and producers, and have never given up. In 14 hours the first day of filming of Deadline will start. For the past 7 months I have been working heavily on pre production with the film’s producer, Brendan. I now have a full cast. Full crew. A script that has been re written and polished for five years. Every location. All the props, all the equipment. and I am making Deadline. I. Do. Not. Give. Up. EVER. If I say I will accomplish something, nothing will stop me. Tomorrow I start the first day of filming on my first feature length film. It’s been a nearly 6 year journey. A lot has happened. Friendships have been lost, friendships have been gained and massive amounts of change have happened. I was 18 when I first started this. I will be 24 by the time filming is finished. When it started I was a young, naive, overweight, parent’s basement dweller, socially awkward, straight edge, film fan who had never been to a rep cinema or had ever had a job. I’m now a still fairly young, far less naive, a lot less overweight, Toronto 5 floor apartment dweller, friendly and outgoing, lover of beer, film fan who's job is public relations at a rep cinema I helped start. I’ve changed vastly. The script of Deadline has been written and re written so many times it barely resembles the original 07 draft (which is good, as that was armature hour beyond belief) It’s now got a immensely layered story with compelling characters and an oddly personal story. It’s been a hell of a long time coming. And it’s only just beginning. Tomorrow, Deadline starts filming. Thought you all should know. |
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